Ok... This is getting ridiculous
Posted on: Friday, 5th of February 2010 | Comment?
I really need to stop complaining about how fail everything is. No one likes it and it makes me look worse every time.I think people can get along with me. It's just taking tiny steps. I think it's a matter of perception (paranoia) that I feel like I repel people on first sight. But how I stop crying and appearing grumpy? I don't know. Everyone has their (at least) one thing that makes them happy - I just have to find mine.
There is someone who I appreciate a lot - but don't know how to show it. He's always putting up with my emo-fail behaviour and telling me to snap out of it. Any other person would run for the hills if they saw how emotional I can get. I think more *hug* are needed.
Life fail
Posted on: Thursday, 4th of February 2010 | Comment?
Well I've actually been trying to socialise. So when I talk to people/a group, I get ignored or talked over. I don't feel welcome anywhere.I don't have any skills I can use in getting a job. Yes I could have some "simple" job like a cashier or something - but a) I fail at communication with people, b) I'm probably too old/ugly for most places.
I lost interest in the project I was doing for school. Granted the game wasn't going to become interesting or make it to any usable state. And the essay/thesis was going nowhere also... I mean... Every time I showed a revision to the teacher, it was wrong. How the fuck was I let into this course if I wasn't able to do the work for it?
I believed I'm locked into the course now. I don't think I can quit without having to pay for the semester I miss out of.
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